At this time of year we can feel the tug of so many activities. December is filled with so many holidays which mean lots of celebrations and feasting. We feel the pull of shopping or creating gifts made with our own hands, and the desire to connect with friends and family near and far through cards, letters and gatherings. In addition, in my household from mid-December to the end of the month, we look forward to wonderful holiday baking and to our household decorations, inside and out. With all this flourish of activity, we can feel exhausted and find it difficult to appreciate the present moment.
So how do we turn things around for ourselves and avoid holiday burnout? For me, it begins with my body. I need to listen carefully and pay attention to its many cues. Maybe I’m feeling tired and need some extra sleep. I might be feeling tension in my neck and shoulders or maybe I notice myself clenching–fists, jaw, or body. That’s a good indication that some deep breathing and exercise are in order–it will help release that pent-up energy. It might be an intense workout, a yoga class, or a nice brisk walk through our neighborhood. No matter the activity, getting ourselves moving and breathing deeply will nourish our bodies as much as a good meal.
And speaking of meals, it’s important that we keep ourselves well fed and hydrated. I’m a much more loving human being when I feed and hydrate myself regularly and properly. Eating meals that we prepare using whole ingredients is much more beneficial than grabbing a fast-food meal or eating at restaurants. Even though they’re convenient, we may be consuming a lot more calories than we really need and those calories may not be nutritionally beneficial. At this time of year when so many sweets and treats surround us, it’s best if we can limit our sugar intake too. Excess sugar gives us that sugar high which unfortunately is followed by an extreme low. It’s best to avoid excess caffeine and alcohol as well. Keep yourself adequately hydrated by choosing water and herbal teas. Even fruits and vegetables contribute to good hydration.
I find that it’s also important to listen to what is important. If something on my list of “to-do’s” makes me cringe, then maybe that something needs to be dropped. Even if I’ve “always done it,” this can be the year to let it go. Although so many magazines and store displays urge us to do it all, the truth is that most of us don’t really enjoy doing everything. We usually have our favorite activities or ones that we feel we do well. Those are the activities we should focus on because they bring something to us in the “doing.”
When I’m finding pleasure in what I’m doing, I notice the ease in my body. My movements are fluid and effortless. However, when what I’m doing causes me some level of distress, I feel the tension in my body and movements. Letting go of an activity doesn’t mean it can’t still be done, but maybe it’s best done by someone else or in a new way. Those holiday cards that I used to hand write and address can be automated. E-cards can even be used. The gift wrapping can be done by someone else or simplified by using gift bags. The long list of cookies and breads that I’ve usually made can be shortened to include only the top favorites.
This year, I personally am making some changes. For example, I will not be mailing out holiday cards in 2009 (I hope all my friends and family see this blog post). I found that in my list of “to do’s,” this just seemed too daunting amongst the other responsibilities and activities on my list. I also will not be baking everything that’s on my historical list. However, my girls and I are continuing to bake our traditional cookies which include Italian and Greek specialties along with my girls’ two favorites. I am taking the approach that this is a change I’m making for this year. Will it be a permanent departure from what I’ve always done? I just don’t know. I only know that for this year, it is essential for my own joy and well-being.
And finally, in thinking about joy, I find that it’s essential for me to check in with my “joy-o-meter” periodically throughout the days of December. Along with how my body feels, my heart also gives me those final indicators which let me know if I’m on track for having a happy and joyful holiday season. Everything we do during the holiday season should truly bring us a feeling of joy. Our giving, whether it be of our time or through the gifts we give, should fill us with as much joy and satisfaction as it does for the recipient. I know this is a hard one to hear and to take to heart, but if what we are doing is from a sense of obligation or even with a touch of resentment and/or resistance, there will be little or no joy for ourselves–and probably little joy for the receiver either.
How we do things is as important as what we do. If you love the music of the season, put it on while you cook, bake, wrap presents, or prepare your cards. If you love all the holiday lights, be sure that you have many around you to fill up your joy-o-meter. Use seasonal elements to fill yourself with joy as you bring joy to others.
Remember the book and movie, “Like Water for Chocolate?” The emotions we are feeling can enter what we make–whether it be food or a gift or a card. So, for the remainder of this month, as the festivities continue, give yourself permission to do what you love, for whom you love, when and how you love to do it.
I wish you a joyous and bellisima holiday season!!
